When you haven’t got a pump action shot gun. Tiger and I called into the Rugby Club and fell in with Victor and Wesley … aka bubble and squeak. Have no idea which one is which. They are as bad as each other. I nearly bust a gut laughing. Ended up with hiccups. They are bad boys with really big funny bones!!! The Eejits.
I love Ballymoney. We moved here almost four years ago and so many lovely peeps have taken pity on us and made us welcome. Well … they’ve made the long suffering husband welcome and they put up with me for his sake. For some reason he continues to live with me and takes all my moaning and groaning in his stride. He deserves a medal.
The much loved and traumatised “Keep’er Lit” was absent in person but was mentioned in dispatches. His trauma is due to toxic shock after the Rock jumped up and pulled my trolleys off one day he was round for a quiet day in. It wasn’t entirely my fault. He was late and I decided to get the glad rags off and put the comfy’s on … and who wears pants under their PJ’s? Not me!
Anyway. Keep’er lit blanched somewhat. The husband barfed. He has no stomach for a bare bum. I ran away. Had to come back to see if Aidan was ok. He was still in shock. It’s sad to see a grown man in that state. I slapped him roon the heed and he came round a bit. After I got him a very large vodka. I had to ask him if he’d noticed that the top and tail don’t match. That’s when he started crying. Big whoose!!!
Meanwhile back at the ranch … I mean the Rugby Club. I took a hand out of birthday boy John. Sorry mate. That’s no way to spend your latter years but TeeHee. I enjoyed it.
Apparently they have a female rugby team and I am champing at the bit to join up. If nothing else I will get free physiotherapy for the arthritic knees.
Perhaps the lads will make me their mascot. How cool would that be? They could bring me onto the pitch on a stretcher with an intravenous drip of fermented apple juice attached to me. I could be a legend.
Forgot to say a few fiends and I went to the Opera House in the big smoke to see Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. It was brilliant. Leslie Joseph looked absolutely gorgeous even though she was the wicked queen. May McFettridge was a hoot and a half. The whole show was fabulous. Portstewart’s Mark Adamson was a fitting prince charming. Tiger and I know his dad. Pete must be really proud of him. Kelly was drooling and pretended it was the heat. I, right!
We had seats up at the front of the god’s area. Have to say that gave me the freaks. I don’t mind flying but looking over that balcony was scary. The kids loved it though. The atmosphere was heart-warming. I couldn’t stop grinning. Not like me, I know, but sometimes I get carried away. Not far enough the husband says. He could have come with us but he won’t leave the Rock. Loves that dog more than me … but let’s face it … who wouldn’t? He did put my electric blanket on and put a hot water bottle in the bed with my nighty and bed socks wrapped round it for when I got home. No more PJ’s says he. It isn’t worth the aftermath and trauma counsellors are in short supply since I moved here … wonder why that is?
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